Kirby vs Abraham Lincoln: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Kirby
“The Pink Puffball” · Nintendo · 1992 · 0′8″ (20 cm), about 4 lb (2 kg)
Round pink hero of Dream Land who inhales enemies and copies their powers. Officially about 20 cm tall, and far tougher than he looks.
Abraham Lincoln
“Honest Abe” · United States · 1809–1865 · 6′4″ (193 cm), about 181 lb (82 kg)
16th US President and commander-in-chief through the Civil War. As a young man, a feared frontier wrestler said to have lost only once in about 300 matches. In the National Wrestling Hall of Fame.
The crowd
Nobody has called this one yet.
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Kirby by DQ. Lincoln, a wrestling Hall of Famer, spends two rounds stooping to swing at a pink puffball, then instinctively hoists him for a throw in round three. That's a foul. Kirby bounces up unbothered and wins by DQ.
Fair fight? Make Lincoln fight on his knees, so he's punching at Kirby's level instead of folding in half, and let the Hall of Fame wrestler keep his hands to himself.
More fights: Kirby · Abraham Lincoln · all fighters