Kirby vs Mario: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Kirby
“The Pink Puffball” · Nintendo · 1992 · 0′8″ (20 cm), about 4 lb (2 kg)
Round pink hero of Dream Land who inhales enemies and copies their powers. Officially about 20 cm tall, and far tougher than he looks.
Mario
“Jumpman” · Nintendo · 1981 · about 5′1″ (155 cm), about 154 lb (70 kg)
Nintendo’s mascot plumber, first seen jumping barrels in Donkey Kong. Has stomped more turtles than anyone alive and can lift Bowser by the tail.
The crowd
Nobody has called this one yet.
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Kirby by DQ. Mario spends round one bending down to punch a 20 cm target who floats away. In round two he grabs Kirby and swings him around like Bowser, forgetting throws are fouls. The famously tough Kirby bounces up unbothered, and the referee disqualifies Mario.
Fair fight? Make Mario fight on his knees so he can reach Kirby with actual punches instead of grabbing him. Kirby stays airborne and unbothered.
More fights: Kirby · Mario · all fighters