Kirby vs Horatio Nelson: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Kirby
“The Pink Puffball” · Nintendo · 1992 · 0′8″ (20 cm), about 4 lb (2 kg)
Round pink hero of Dream Land who inhales enemies and copies their powers. Officially about 20 cm tall, and far tougher than he looks.
Horatio Nelson
“Hero of the Nile” · United Kingdom · 1758–1805 · about 5′5″ (165 cm), about 132 lb (60 kg)
British admiral who destroyed the French and Spanish fleets at Trafalgar in 1805 and died at the moment of victory. Fought on after losing the sight of one eye and most of his right arm.
The crowd
Nobody has called this one yet.
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Nelson by Decision. Nelson wins by decision. Kirby is tougher than he looks and floats out of trouble, so the referee never steps in. But Nelson, 145 cm taller, keeps tagging the headband-wearing puffball with his one good arm, seasick or not, and takes all three rounds on the scorecards.
Fair fight? Make Nelson fight on his knees, or fight Kirby in a tabletop-sized ring, so the pink puffball's headband and floating can actually reach the admiral's chin.
More fights: Kirby · Horatio Nelson · all fighters