Abraham Lincoln vs Mario: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Abraham Lincoln
“Honest Abe” · United States · 1809–1865 · 6′4″ (193 cm), about 181 lb (82 kg)
16th US President and commander-in-chief through the Civil War. As a young man, a feared frontier wrestler said to have lost only once in about 300 matches. In the National Wrestling Hall of Fame.
Mario
“Jumpman” · Nintendo · 1981 · about 5′1″ (155 cm), about 154 lb (70 kg)
Nintendo’s mascot plumber, first seen jumping barrels in Donkey Kong. Has stomped more turtles than anyone alive and can lift Bowser by the tail.
The crowd
Nobody has called this one yet.
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Lincoln by DQ. Mario spends two rounds ground-pounding a man 38 cm taller and getting nowhere, then hops on the ropes for a flying stomp. The former wrestling champ shrugs it off, but the stomp is a foul, and the ref DQs Mario on the spot.
Fair fight? Ban ground-pounds and stomps outright, and let Mario bring Luigi as a tag partner to even the size gap.
More fights: Abraham Lincoln · Mario · all fighters