Mario vs Napoléon Bonaparte: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Mario
“Jumpman” · Nintendo · 1981 · about 5′1″ (155 cm), about 154 lb (70 kg)
Nintendo’s mascot plumber, first seen jumping barrels in Donkey Kong. Has stomped more turtles than anyone alive and can lift Bowser by the tail.
Napoléon Bonaparte
“The Little Corporal” · France · 1769–1821 · 5′7″ (169 cm), about 170 lb (77 kg)
Emperor of the French who conquered much of Europe before his final defeat at Waterloo in 1815. Not actually short: about average for his time. The myth came from British cartoons and French inches.
The crowd
Mario 100%, Napoléon Bonaparte 0% (1 vote).
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Napoleon by DQ. Mario, all bounce and no discipline, out-hops the stockier Napoleon for two rounds — then instinct wins and he ground-pounds the Emperor's skull like a Goomba. Referee has no choice: stomping is a foul, so Napoleon, still seeing stars, is awarded the fight by disqualification.
Fair fight? Ban Mario's jump entirely, forcing a flat-footed boxing match where his stomp reflex can't trigger a foul.
More fights: Mario · Napoléon Bonaparte · all fighters