Napoléon Bonaparte vs Samus Aran: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Napoléon Bonaparte
“The Little Corporal” · France · 1769–1821 · 5′7″ (169 cm), about 170 lb (77 kg)
Emperor of the French who conquered much of Europe before his final defeat at Waterloo in 1815. Not actually short: about average for his time. The myth came from British cartoons and French inches.
Samus Aran
“The Hunter” · Metroid · 1986 · 6′3″ (190 cm), 198 lb (90 kg)
Galactic bounty hunter raised by the bird-like Chozo, who wipes out Metroids for a living. Nintendo lists 190 cm and 90 kg; fans still argue whether that includes the Power Suit.
The crowd
Nobody has called this one yet.
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Samus by TKO. Napoleon, 21 cm shorter and trained for artillery not fisticuffs, keeps circling for a cannon that never comes. Samus, heavier and quicker on her feet from years dodging Metroids, backs him into a corner and the towel flies in round two.
Fair fight? Give Napoleon his old artillery corps as cornermen shouting range-finding advice, since he's got nothing else to close a 13 kg gap.
More fights: Napoléon Bonaparte · Samus Aran · all fighters