Ulysses S. Grant vs Yoshi: who would win in a fist fight?
Pick the winner and how they win (TKO, DQ or decision), then see how everyone else called it.
Ulysses S. Grant
“Unconditional Surrender” · United States · 1822–1885 · 5′8″ (173 cm), about 134 lb (61 kg)
Union general who won the American Civil War, then 18th US President. Slight of build, a superb horseman, and famously calm under fire.
Yoshi
“T. Yoshisaur Munchakoopas” · Nintendo · 1990 · about 5′3″ (160 cm), about 132 lb (60 kg)
Friendly green dinosaur and Mario’s loyal ride since Super Mario World. Swallows enemies whole with a long tongue and turns them into eggs. Nintendo has never published his measurements.
The crowd
Nobody has called this one yet.
The AI’s verdict (spoiler)
Grant by DQ. Yoshi flutter-jumps in round one, hovers like a nervous chandelier, then ground-pounds a calmly waiting Grant. Stomps are fouls, so the referee disqualifies him. Grant, famously unruffled under fire, wins without landing a punch.
Fair fight? Legalise the ground-pound so Yoshi's signature move scores instead of costing him the fight. Grant then has to stay calm while a dinosaur drops on him from mid-flutter.
More fights: Ulysses S. Grant · Yoshi · all fighters